Going Downhill From Here Onwards...

Been feeling very gloomy and depressed lately..not to mention bored as well. Days been very long. The past 3 days have felt like a week to me.
*this is weird. I'm in my school's library now and there's a guy sitting in the computer next to me sleeping.*
I don't know what's up with me but I think I'm going rather downhill. Hard to put it in words but I'll try anyway. Funny to know that alot of people are in awe of me cause I'm able to come here to Singapore and study..I find that rather amusing yet I feel rather pressured by it. People seem to expect great things out of me. I know I'm capable but right now I'm just not good enough yet. My pace is still very slow. Sometimes..I wonder how I was sorted into my current class (the 2nd best class in the triple science stream = physics + chemistry + biology). I often wonder whether there's a mistake or not because I'm like a failure compared to the rest. Everyone's doing much better than me. I don't get it. I just don't understand a lot of things here. You might tell me...ask your tutors. I would and I want to but sometimes I dare not ask because at certain points, the tutors seem to ALWAYS expect my class to be really fantastic and understand everything..but I don't always do. Sometimes..they go like "I expect you guys to understand this" and I tend to feel guilty because I don't really understand it. Yet I dare not ask of fear of the feeling of appearing "intellectually challenged" (:P) in front of everyone. I know I ought to ask but I just don't know. I'm not used to not understanding so much stuff. Been feeling very lousy compared to everyone. Everyone seems so much better (even in every aspect. Or maybe it's because I'm surrounded by alot of scholars?) and even my marks are lower than the "not-so-good" ones. I keep failing everything...
I felt extra guilty and bad today when my class tutor had a word with me about my "depressing and getting-worse" results. Partially, they're caused by lack of revision which is entirely my fault. I still haven't perfected the art of time management yet. I'm getting better at it and still trying to improve myself. The other part is because I don't understand a lot of stuff and never ask and even just laid it aside. I think it's also because of my attitude. Unknown to many of you, I actually have this side of me which is rather cocky in the sense that I've gained some sort of confidence that I'm clever and can ace any test without full revision. This used to work for me......in Malaysia. All I can say is that...not anymore my friend. It doesn't work well here in Singapore. I'm worried because I still have that habit and it's taking me quite an effort to get rid of it. I don't know what to do. All I know is that I need to ask more,revise alot more , mug more and manage my time more properly...otherwise I'll really turn out into the failure that I'm describing about.

*still am worried about my CA marks which have been nothing more than single digits...Am worried too about the fact that they contribute to 30% of my Promo Exams at the end of the year. I need to buck up. Can't let everyone down when they hoping so much out of me and giving me alot as well *

CA= Common Assessment = Tests

::: WILL WRITE THE NEXT PART ABOUT THE CONCERT WHEN I'M FREE. STUDIES ARE FIRST FOR NOW.